How a Successful Businessman Became Socially Challenged by Twitter, Facebook, Mobile Phones & GPS
Who Needs GPS?
He thought about the 30 year business he ran with 1800 employees, all without a Blackberry that played music, took videos, pictures and communicated with Facebook and Twitter.
He signed up under duress for Twitter and Facebook, so his seven kids, their spouses, 13 grandkids and 2 great grand kids could communicate with him in the modern way. He figured he could handle something as simple as Twitter with only 140 characters of space.
That was before one of his grand-kids hooked him up for Tweeter, Tweetree, Twhirl, Twitterfon, Tweetie and Twittererific, Tweetdeck, Twitpix and something that sends every message to his cell phone and every other program within the texting world.
His phone was beeping every three minutes with the details of everything except the jean sizes of the next generation. He was not ready to live like this. He keep his cell phone in the garage in his golf bag.
The kids bought him a GPS for his last birthday because they say he get lost every now and then going over to the grocery store or library. He keeps that in a box under his tool bench with the Blue tooth [it’s red] phone he’s supposed to use when he drives. He wore it once and was standing in line at Barnes and Noble talking to his wife as everyone in the nearest 50 yards was glaring at him. Seems he had to take his hearing aid out to use it and he got a little loud.
The GPS looked pretty smart on his dash board, but the lady inside was the most annoying, rudest person he had run into in a long time. Every 10 minutes, she would sarcastically say, “Re-calc-ul-ating” You would think that she could be nicer.. It was like she could barely tolerate him. She would let go with a deep sigh and then tell him to make a U-turn at the next light.
Then when he would make a right turn instead, it was not good.
When he gets really lost now, he calls his wife and tell her the name of the cross streets and while she is starting to develop the same tone as Gypsy, the GSP lady, at least she loves him.
To be perfectly frank, he is still trying to learn how to use the cordless phones in his house. He has had it for 4 years, but still has to dig under chair cushions and check bathrooms and the dirty laundry baskets when the phone rings.
The world is just getting too complex. They even mess him up every time he goes to the grocery store. You would think they could settle on something themselves, but this sudden “Paper or Plastic?” every time he goes to check out just knocks him for a loop.
So he bought some of those cloth reusable bags to avoid looking confused but never remember to take them in with him.
Now he tosses it back to them. When they ask, “Paper or Plastic?” – he just says, “Doesn’t matter to me. I am bi-sacksual…”
Then it’s their turn to stare with a blank look.